Get a move on!
Is this the face you want waking you up at 5:30am?
Inspector Clouseau The Designated Expert rousts everyone out of bed at an ungodly hour for their next challenge.
But it was totally worth the effort to get up so early... to do product placement for Audi.
It isn't all that different from pimping out the artists to get new book cover art. But I'm getting a little irritated at this direction "Work of Art" is taking.
The official assignment: create a piece that reflects their experience of driving the streets of Manhattan (to go to Audi's big ol' showroom). Cartoony Boy, whom the show is leaning on more and more to narrate, said it best: it's really hard to produce something interesting when the topic is so vague. And that vagueness is overwhelming some artists, especially Starvingartist and Tortured Artist.
You knew that was going to be his way of dealing, didn't you? But it produces ideas the judges like. Maybe Starvingartist could use a nap too.
Concerned? A little bit hokey? Ringring... "Kettle, this is The Pot. You're black."
This week's guest judge, contemporary portraitist Richard Phillips, is suitably horrified by both, as are the regulars.
At the gallery, we see The Newb getting more paranoid about the competition, while Goofball goes "balls to the wall" trying something new (layers of paint instead of a photograph). The result is what Phillips calls "painterbation" (think self-satisfaction instead of communicating with the viewer). Weird White Girl has fun playing on the sound of the word "Audi" and 'Toony Boy gives us a race car driver who may or may not have sold out. All but three artists are sent home to live another day, not having repulsed the judges enough to be eliminated.
But once again, the judges luuuuurve Tortured -- and this time, Designated Hotness. Who of course made art about turning "the male gaze" away from her poor vulnerable implants and back upon itself. Don't get me wrong: the male gaze is an important feminist concept. But that's a tad self-delusional coming from someone who works with paint and other semi-toxic chemicals, yet exposes her cleavage to said toxins even when she covers everything else.
The Christian, who called DH on her attention-seeking, gets sent home. Starving barely escapes by the skin of his "narcissistic" teeth. DH gets immunity and proof that Her Art is Really Meaningful.
Join the party, y'all! Tell me what you thought about the episode, in the comments.
The official assignment: create a piece that reflects their experience of driving the streets of Manhattan (to go to Audi's big ol' showroom). Cartoony Boy, whom the show is leaning on more and more to narrate, said it best: it's really hard to produce something interesting when the topic is so vague. And that vagueness is overwhelming some artists, especially Starvingartist and Tortured Artist.
Concerned? A little bit hokey? Ringring... "Kettle, this is The Pot. You're black."
The Christian, who called DH on her attention-seeking, gets sent home. Starving barely escapes by the skin of his "narcissistic" teeth. DH gets immunity and proof that Her Art is Really Meaningful.
Join the party, y'all! Tell me what you thought about the episode, in the comments.
Shocker.
If you have to create "shocking art" on demand, then aren't you just making a faux-edgy ad campaign?
In last night's ep, Switzerland minced in, wearing heels with a six-year-old's party dress, and told the "Work of Art" contestants they'd have to create "a shocking piece of art." And to judge the shock value:
Andres Serrano (on the right), the creator of "Piss Christ." You remember that, don't you?
Obviously "shocking" means different things to different people, which gave Bravo a chance to highlight the Christian.
She drew a cartoon version of the Last Supper, with the "apostles" holding weapons and generally sinning all around a horrified Jesus. The Christian's piece was a commentary on hypocrisy in the evangelical community (she's from Oklahoma). But ya know... most people raised outside of the Bible Belt just aren't really shocked by that. Really, there aren't many inside the Bible Belt shocked by it either.
And how many of you are shocked by Designated Hotness' never-ending quest to exploit her nudity? The photos only became interesting when the Newb suggested giving viewers Sharpies to scrawl graffiti on the photos. Here's a shocker: DH took credit for the Newb's idea.
Once again, Tortured Artist and Cartoony Boy had attention-getting pieces. Tortured... added something of himself to a piece inspired by his first erection. Watching Disney's "The Little Mermaid."
But finally -- finally! -- 'Toony Boy's talent elbowed aside Tortured's personal drama. He created "I.E.D": a piece depicting young black men raised in chaotic homes as "improvised explosive devices" ready to go off in a 'post-racial' society. The judges loved how the piece became more disturbing the more they thought about its story.
'Toony makes some amazing stuff for someone who's barely 23. But youth was also the underlying problem with most of the pieces. Something that shocks a 24-year-old (at least, one who's had a childhood free of serious abuse and neglect) will barely nudge the sensibilities of 50-something art critics.
Which was why this challenge was really difficult for The Only Gay in the Village.
But the judges thought TOGV's sexuality should've been part of the discussion. They said his piece would have been shocking only if he'd photographed himself in the position he chose to paint. Considering the position (see it on Bravo's site), they had a point.
But there was no discernible point Nao/Now's performance art. It was just a literal and figurative mess. And she can't be excused by her youth: she's twice as old as 'Toony Boy. So in ep 4's double-elimination, the judges sent home Nao/Now... and TOGV. Totally deserved on her part, not so much for TOGV. The Christian should've been sent packing instead.
Come on -- you know Americans are satire-impaired! How are we going to recognize earnest religious commentary without lots of signposts?! Post your thoughts on this ep in the comments section.
Obviously "shocking" means different things to different people, which gave Bravo a chance to highlight the Christian.
But the judges thought TOGV's sexuality should've been part of the discussion. They said his piece would have been shocking only if he'd photographed himself in the position he chose to paint. Considering the position (see it on Bravo's site), they had a point.
Culture and clash
Sorry for the snark delay... technical difficulties, so I'll have to borrow Bravo's stills and Hulu's video (because Bravo doesn't know how to post embed code without BREAKS in it).
On with the smackdown, shall we?
This week's challenge: create an eye-catching book cover for a classic. Each artist had to design a cover for "Pride and Prejudice," "Dracula," "Frankenstein" or "The Time Machine."
And what a great prize: the winning piece will actually be used for the next edition of the book in question. High culture, and a clash of opposites in terms of the challenge's effect on the artists.
Goofball and... let's call him Pattern Guy (AKA The Only Gay in the Village) loved the challenge.Goofball's a photog with lots of commercial and Photoshop experience, so he knew exactly where he wanted to go with this assignment.
Ready for printing, right there.
Gray Panther, on the other hand... horrified at the very concept of Art in the Service of Commerce. She doesn't do commissions, she doesn't do spec work, and she doesn't have the faintest idea what to do. Finally she decided just to give the middle finger to the assignment and the judges. She focused on the words of the title. Written backwards.
These are classics of literature! Your two biggest selling points are the title and the author!
Maybe I shouldn't mention Designated Hotness because she's been such an easy mark... but she keeps giving me reasons to close my eyes in agony. She's been assigned "Pride & Prejudice," which she's never read. "I've seen the movie..." Sigh.
So her fallback was her back; nude photo shoot in the bathroom, throw something together from that. Distract the judges with sex appeal!
And she misspelled Jane Austen's last name. Despite having a copy of the book on hand
Compare that to Tortured Artist, who'd never read Mary Shelley's Frankstein. But he calculated that he could read the book for the first time, and finish his piece on time.
Okay results, I suppose, but that's the second time he's used a blueprint in his artwork. It really came down to Goofball and Pattern Guy TOGV.
His first thought was to use color that would grab the reader from across the room.
TOGV imagined a faceted, whirling time machine -- see the tiny ladder to the left? -- with text that seemed to be whooshing by. Nice concept. I might pick up one of those abstract "reimagined classics" book covers. But they don't really do anything for me. The judges thought it kicked ass, though.
And then they kicked out Gray Panther.
Kelly called it on Facebook:
I think Gray Panther's been doing her own thing, her own way for too long to be on this show. She said as much in her parting comment: "I guess I just wasn't able to adapt to the situation." But it's your job as a contestant to adapt. That, and play to the camera.
On with the smackdown, shall we?
This week's challenge: create an eye-catching book cover for a classic. Each artist had to design a cover for "Pride and Prejudice," "Dracula," "Frankenstein" or "The Time Machine."
Gray Panther, on the other hand... horrified at the very concept of Art in the Service of Commerce. She doesn't do commissions, she doesn't do spec work, and she doesn't have the faintest idea what to do. Finally she decided just to give the middle finger to the assignment and the judges. She focused on the words of the title. Written backwards.
Maybe I shouldn't mention Designated Hotness because she's been such an easy mark... but she keeps giving me reasons to close my eyes in agony. She's been assigned "Pride & Prejudice," which she's never read. "I've seen the movie..." Sigh.
And she misspelled Jane Austen's last name. Despite having a copy of the book on hand
Compare that to Tortured Artist, who'd never read Mary Shelley's Frankstein. But he calculated that he could read the book for the first time, and finish his piece on time.
On these shows I always say that if they spend too much time showing one character throughout the episode that is the person who is going home. And sure enough, it was true tonight. I pegged who was going home at about the halfway point. And boy, what a stinker she made.
I think Gray Panther's been doing her own thing, her own way for too long to be on this show. She said as much in her parting comment: "I guess I just wasn't able to adapt to the situation." But it's your job as a contestant to adapt. That, and play to the camera.